OT - Any rubbish chess players?

[Richard]

"Prawn"  -  Is that the famous seafood opening ?

Richard

[guest7]

Ok but you're paying the medical bills for the psychiatric rehabilitation once you tip poor Rob over the edge..

We can hasten his mental demise if all us veteran Mornington Crescent players start a TC virtual game.

I'm aware that some of you prefer playing by the codes set out in the 1974 Oslo Summit, which is fine and I agree that the 'O74' game doesn't suffer from interrupted play when an alliterative triple is achieved. However, I prefer to play using the pre-74 protocols, with the caveat that alliterative play is limited to two at most, with none of the associated forfeits (rolling up of trouser legs, etc.) that marked the playing of the game prior to Oslo.

I'm sure I'm not alone in using a good luck mascot when playing. I rarely play without the comfort of having my points scorer, Samantha, sat on my right hand. Talking of Samantha, she is off to meet her new boyfriend. He's a chef who specialises in cooking unusual cuts of meat in alcohol-based sauces, she says she's looking forward to a bit of tongue in cider tonight (boom boom  )

Anyway back to the game, I will open with 'Moorgate'.

GC

[robG]

I shall be sitting back, observing from the sidelines whilst practicing the Speyside manouvere.

Rob.

[Andy M]

Ok but you're paying the medical bills for the psychiatric rehabilitation once you tip poor Rob over the edge..

Hmm, a somewhat cautious opening Andy? and in old style notation too just to make me concentrate
Ok, I'll answer your opening (PC2 - C3 for the youngsters) with Knight to Queens Bishop 3 (B8 - C6)

Right, so the horsie one goes three forward and one to the side does it? In which case, right hand horsie out and to the right please 

Andy

[guest7]

I shall be sitting back, observing from the sidelines whilst practicing the Speyside manouvere. 

Initially your comment confused me, but then I realised you were talking about the little-known 'Speyside sidestep'. I remember this tactic being employed to great effect by my MC mentor, Roger 'Rowboat' Roeburton, a venerable player of the game who generously offered coaching to all the young men in the area who showed an interest in playing Mornington Crescent. Many a time he would play on into the early hours and then, after downing his last sherry, he would declare, "oh dear I've missed the bally night bus, any chance I can bunk down here young man?" I remember he did seem to fidget a lot during his sleep, but he put it down to war nerves and I let it go.

As for the Speyside sidestep, it belongs to a class of tactic that these days would be seen as needlessly longwinded involving, as it does, up to three preceding set moves to initiate a game-ending coup de grace for the unfortunate opponent. The last time I used the tactic it brought vivid memories of late nights in a smoke filled games room and the smell of sherry on a moustached lip....

GC

[mini-thumper]

Is a 'porn queen' manouvre something different?

BB

[Mark]

Talking of Samantha, she is off to meet her new boyfriend. He's a chef who specialises in cooking unusual cuts of meat in alcohol-based sauces, she says she's looking forward to a bit of tongue in cider tonight (boom boom  )

GC

Still doesn't sound as bad as sitting on YOUR right hand.

[jules]

{ Now that my belly has calmed  }.
Rob.

There is an awful lot of Belly to calm ! 

Jethro

Is that you throwing stones you big Queen,i bet you have been sat on your brains picking your belly button trying to get over the sniffles you call a cold

[robG]

I shall be sitting back, observing from the sidelines whilst practicing the Speyside manouvere.

Rob.

Clearly this is to be a war of attrition. To which end , I have decided to conduct the Merlot defence and await results.
The Speyside manouvere, whilst traditional in format, can, over a period of time, destabilise the user. I understand that on several occasions this was the case with King Edward VII and may have led to a number of 'incidents' with staff members,

The last time I used the tactic it brought vivid memories of late nights in a smoke filled games room and the smell of sherry on a moustached lip....

In response to Gc , I remember ' Sherry ', splendid Gal!. Did sterling service behind the NAAFI so I recall.

Rob.

[guest18]

Right, so the horsie one goes three forward and one to the side does it? In which case, right hand horsie out and to the right please 

Andy

Would that be a sea horsie?? Ok, Knight G1 to H3 for you.. I shall move my horsie G8 to F6 then 

[002]

{ Now that my belly has calmed  }.
Rob.

There is an awful lot of Belly to calm ! 

Jethro

Is that you throwing stones you big Queen,i bet you have been sat on your brains picking your belly button trying to get over the sniffles you call a cold

No No No ! I have been sat on my Hand so that it feels like someone else picking my belly button trying to get over the sniffles I call a cold.

Jethro