Funnilly enough on the way home tonight I was pootling along filtering in the appalling (Highland show) traffic in the cue for the Forth Bridge when a large BMW saloon pointedly moved over to block my progress, I gave him a minute or so to see how determined he was then nipped across behind him and passed him on the right through the yawning gap of (clean!) tarmac he'd left me...
As I passed him the youngish bloke behind the wheel shouted something (several things I suspect), so I slowed and allowed him to draw level to see what he had to say...
Apparently, it's people like me who cause accidents and I should wait in the queue like everyone else

(no doubt adding to the cue but I'm sure that fact has passed him by

)because there are two lanes not three (with expletives naturally).
Actually there are three marked lanes on that part of the road, four if you count the slip road but I thought that particular observation might go over his head so I suggested instead that perhaps it was people like him who caused accidents by purposely obstructng people... as he seemed in danger of getting over-excited at this I decided to move on (and save his poor girlfriend/wife further embarrasment, she looked as though she wanted the ground to open up and swallow her).
Squirting ahead and slightly to the left of lane ready to start filtering again he gunned his car and used all the road including the manky bit off to the right of the carriageway to draw alongside me and wave goodbye, although quite why he should wave cheerio by emulating shaking an aerosol can we're left to guess...

Naturally out of politeness I replied in kind before scooting off out of the way.
Why do I always seem to attract the berserkers

My riding really isn't *that* objectionable! Honest!
I had another one yesterday, I was bopping up the back road towards home doing just over 40mph (on a road relatively recently re-restricted from 60mph down to 40mph) when on coming round a corner I saw a bloke coming down the hill almost climbing out of his seat gesticulating at me to slow down

my first thought was maybe he's warning of a speed trap but there were no Police anywhere on the road after that, just another one of the self appointed traffic berserkers like the ones who flash their headlamps frantically when you overtake and they are oncoming (and miles away usually

)
I know we have our share of nutters on bikes, but ffs I'm riding a very quiet, very sensible bike in IAM style and I'm getting this nonsense??
I'm tempted to go back to riding like an a**e and bo**ox to the lot of them!

(I won't mind you, it's much more fun winding them up whilst being "mr reasonable"

even more fun when you can see that there significant other is going to give them a well deserved ear bashing the second you're gone

)