Start the week topic 20th October

[guest7]

As I was making my lonely way up to Dent this weekend, I fell back into my bad habit of talking to myself as I rode along. Sometimes I sing, but sometimes I talk... all sorts of bollocks.

One example was when I passed a sign saying 'no hard shoulder for 300 yards' which I repeated for ten solid minutes... in a clipped Noel Coward voice. The I started adding cowardesque phrases like, 'but your soft shoulder will do my dear, yes your soft shoulder should do' 

Later in the trip I was getting stressed about riding a poorly braked outfit on country lanes in the pouring rain when I saw a sign saying 'Think Bike'. I screamed "That's all I'm fucking thinking about you cunt, I'm thinking about not crashing this bike... you bastards"

I put it down to sleep deprivation.

What songs or ponderings do you fall into on long trips?
GC

[Richard]

Thanks God.  I thought it was just me.............

Richard

[Steffan]

But you're an atheist

Thanking God - which God?

Steffan

[002]

But you're an atheist

Thanking God - which God?

Steffan

The God of all Things Mechanical !


Jethro

[squirrelciv]

The list is endless! I once travelled the length of the M5 shouting Gypo! to every car I overtook or that overtook me. The Idea of the game is to use as many different accents and styles as you can without repeating yourself.

Then there's the Wazzerk, Boggy or Honeybunny game. As you overtake assess the driver according to whether they are a Wazzerk (nearly all males) Boggy (Ugly woman, occasionally serverely ugly bloke) or Honeybunny (you can guess that one)

Or sing some random song and change all the lyrics to fit with what you can see at the time. An example is: On the way to work I quite often see Downton lorries, this gets worked into Petula Clarkes 'Down town' changing the lyrics to discribe the road at the time, or what just overtook the lorry, or what the weather's doing.

On this trip to Dent, Boyd gave me a pair of ear plugs to try. Spent the rest of the Journey making random noises to see what they'd sound like. Best was knocking my teeth together while grinning.

I have loadsa fun me.

[steveD]

Yeah we can tell from the POTD!

[Steve Lake]

It varies with my mood.....I'll either sing 'wild rover' in a variety of accents picked up from where i've lived (mainly....Norfolk.....Cornish....and sarf lunnen)...this i find immensely entertaining, and end up larfin.....what a sad git...i really must get out more
or...if i'm subject to or witnes some cr4p driving...I compose letters to the chief constable, again in a variety of dialects...reporting the miscreant and advising on suitable punishment......these usually get me past the cold/pain/etc barrier and onto the next tea stop

[Andy M]

Ah, but have you noticed certain songs have no end? "Down Town" is one of note, after 120 miles you can still be on "where the Neon lights are pretty".

There is of course number plate scrabble which is a useful measure of how cold, tired, ****** off you are (eg when you can't make a word out of B123UGR, it's time to stop), or the more dangerous overtaking snooker (a variation on West Yorkshire police's infamous speeding ticket snooker).

Certain parts of the medical profession would have a ball 

Andy

[robG]

Today , in a rare dollop of sunshine , I took the XS out for a toddle . Things went quite well and I found myself stooging around at angels 15 , quickly approaching a  slower moving bomber formation on the 4232. All of a sudden the film 'Battle of Britain ' leapt to the fore .I was a Polish fighter pilot attacking the Luftwaffe hoards ..........

Safety off ....check the angle of deflection....

DAKKA!  DAKKA!  DAKKA!  ..........

Far away shout of ' Achtung Spitfire !'

Junkers 88 { Black Ford Focus } erupts into a ball of flame { no chutes , instant death,}

Onto the next in the formation , some tracer coming back from the rear gunner { small child in rear seat, flicking the vics }

DAKKA! DAKKA! DAKKA!................

You get the picture I'm sure ......

[bullet350]

whenever i enter buckinghamshire, i shout 'BUCKINGHAMSHIRE!' in a loud and posh voice. Dunno why but i've done it for about 5 years now.

Also the theme tune from Steptoe & Son, as well as Moto GP bike sounds to make up for my quiet exhaust.

Every now and then a loud 'MEEHP' from General Melchett (Blackadder goes forth) errupts from my pie hole, especially when a fine moustache is spotted.

Once i did 550miles in a day on my CB500, all alone on french motorways. During those 10 hours i dabbled quite frequently with the motorcycle equivalent of 'Cabin Fever' and had many a conversation with myself and the road furniture!

bullet350

[guest7]

On a nice run one summer, playing tail and charlie with a couple of slowish riders, I had the luxury of being able to really relax into the ride. As we crossed Powys I started doing a mock Alan Whicker style commentary on everything I saw. If I say so myself some if it was really funny, but a tad strange.

Two worrying things: it said stuff about my subconscious that I didn't care to examine and it went on for nearly two hours 

GC

[squirrelciv]

whenever i enter buckinghamshire, i shout 'BUCKINGHAMSHIRE!' in a loud and posh voice. Dunno why but i've done it for about 5 years now.


bullet350

Got exactly the same thing going on when I ride through SHROPSHIRE. Came from an episode of some spin off comedy show from 'Only fools & horses' with Trigger & Marlene.

[Richard]

> Thanks God.  I thought it was just me.............

Talking to myself again..............

Richard

[guest18]

Junkers 88 { Black Ford Focus } erupts into a ball of flame { no chutes , instant death,}

Onto the next in the formation , some tracer coming back from the rear gunner { small child in rear seat, flicking the vics }

DAKKA! DAKKA! DAKKA!................

You get the picture I'm sure ......

You've been looking in my head.. Except it was a Wellington and I was piloting an Emil...

[002]

Old trick I used to do very frequentley when Despatching.

When the road was relatively clear !!!!!!!!!
Close my eyes and start counting....see how long I could keep my eyes shut and to see if I stayed in the same lane ??

Wouldnt do that now....Well Not Too Often.....too much traffic !!!!

Jethro